Sunday, June 26, 2005

Eye Love Veins

and puns

Christian Bale has an amazing assortment of veins under his right eye that, in my opinion, are not being showcased enough. Of course, I'm a weirdo attracted to things like that and Hollywood is a big fan of Photoshop:

(and yes, I'm also oddly attracted to him in that picture). Below is the only picture I could find that even remotely shows the veins, because they seem to only appear when the man is leaning forward, and also because they might be getting booted out of his photos by Hollywood jerks. Or maybe he's sensitive about them and requests that they be removed. If this is the case Mr. Bale, leave Hollywood and come live with me. I enjoy candy and I seldom wear pants. Also when you feel self conscious about your veins, I'll let you track the giant blue veins from the tip of my left middle finger, up my left arm, across my chest in a giant squiggly display, down my right arm and on out to the tip of my right middle finger. I'm no stranger to the veins.

In this picture, you can sort of see the shape, but not the marvelous blue colour that sometimes goes along with it. So, if you are planning on seeing "Batman Begins" in the near future (which I recommend, so much black and pointiness!), watch for a scene near the end when Mr. Wayne is leaning over going through blackened rubble. Here you can see protruding eye veins in all their glory.

Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Off Of Body Experience

Why am I always coming across pigeon wings without pigeon bodies attached to them?

Wednesday, June 01, 2005

I am your insane co-worker.

I enjoy randomly throwing out your things. I know, mostly it's just things you like to put on the bulletin board we share, like Spiderman candy wrappers and what I feel are stupid pieces of paper. But occasionally it's actually a note that you need there for your job, and sometimes I'll even throw something you worked on and really liked into someone else's recycle bin, or maybe throw out your stapler because I no longer need it. I'm not good at covering my tracks and I don't care if you might want to keep these things. I know I should realize that since you pinned or taped them up, that does mean you want to keep them. But I either don't realize this or, more than likely, don't care. I don't like the fact that you work at My Desk when I'm not at work, despite the fact it originated as your desk, as you've worked with this company longer than I have. Am I trying to drive you crazy so you'll leave your job around the same time my temporary position ends, or am I just insane and must continue to throw out things belonging to you? I know, my intentions seem strange. Because they are. My main intention is to dislike you and try to make you feel unwelcome. I fail to realize that people prefer to work with you, since you can actually do your job without irritating the rest of the office and coughing on everything, and that my actions, while annoying, really only cause you to laugh at how insane I am and discuss it with co-workers who have to put up with me all week, even those who have told the boss they will leave their job after five years if I am hired on permanently. I am a sad person and I require power over your papers.